I'll have what SHE'S having

So, you know how I live with my mommy and daddy, right? Well, my mom makes my breakfast and snacks for me. I know, I know. But I tell her she doesn't have to and she claims that she doesn't mind, so I let her. And some days she says, "I don't feel like making your toast and snack tomorrow, so you need to do it yourself." And I say, "Ok." And she makes it anyway. So what can I do? But I think she's getting passive aggressive with my snacks. I always take a tomato juice and a bag of celery and carrots on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and a variety of snacks on Tuesday and Thursday. But she's started screwing it all up, and she'll send the celery and carrots on Tuesday and Thursday. And a lot of times she'll just send carrots, and I've told her I really prefer celery. She says she got confused on the days, but she didn't change back after I pointed it out to her. Passive aggressive.

She used to make my lunch too, but then she was always bitching about it, and I would feel bad, so we got into a huge fight about it and now she doesn't make my lunch anymore. At first she stopped making my lunch to punish me, but I was so glad about it, she stopped altogether. So every once in a while she tries to make me lunch, and I tell her not to, and she gets upset, and we go on. Well, yesterday, (meaning last Tuesday, as I started writing this post last Wednesday and never got around to finishing it.) I walk in and see that she has a bag of frozen shrimp sitting on the counter, which means she's been thinking about making lunch for me again. And, it's not even started yet, so even if she insisted on making it, it probably wouldn't be ready in time and I'd have to rush to eat before going back to work. I hate when she pulls this crap. so with a sigh of annoyance, I say, "There's frozen shrimp sitting out," so that we can go ahead and get this nonsense out of the way. She says, "Yeah, I was thinking about making you some shrimp scampi for lunch." "Well, there's no need for that, I'll just have a peanut butter sandwich," is what I was going to say, but instead I found the words, "Shrimp scampi? That's sounds really good," escaping my lips, unbidden, in meek subservient tones. "Yeah, and I thought that you could cut some slices of avocado and tomato and make an avocado salad to go with it," says she. "Oooh, avocado salad?" I say breathlessly. I have now entered the early stages of culinary orgasm. I call it the excited and tingly stage. "Can you hand me the butter and lime juice?" she says. *Oh yeah* "Do you think 3 cloves of garlic is enough?" *gasp grunt grunt* I cut up the avocados, which are perfectly green without a speck of brown *Ohhh* and are the perfect softness *oh baby, oh yeah* and the tomatoes, which are at the peak of sweet ripeness. *OHH OHH* I adorn them with lime juice, *AHH* salt, *UHHH* lemon pepper, *GASP* and garlic powder. *OH YES!* The shrimp is cooked up quickly and mom piles half on my plate, and I quickly fill up the other half of the plate with avocado salad. *YES! YES!!* I try to eat slowly, but I can't help it, my breath comes quickly as I savor every succulent bite. *OH GOD! YES YES!!* Mom says, "I can't eat the rest of this avocado salad, do you want the rest? "Sure," I reply. *AH AHHH AHHHH Aaaahhhhh* Oh fuck that was good. Man. That means I have to be nice to mom for like a whole week. *sigh* It's a natural of losing control I guess. I think it was worth it, though.

Give me the jitters!

I've been mulling something over, and I need your input. I'm seriously thinking about getting back on the sauce. By sauce I mean soda. Specifically caffeinated soda. I haven't drank caffeine in approximately 3 years, and I'm getting pretty sick of it. So here I will present the pro's and con's of each side and you tell me what you think.

CON:

-Caffeine is bad for you. That's what they say anyway.
-Caffeine is addictive, and I try to avoid addictive things. That's why I got off it in the first place.
-Caffeine could contribute to my migraines. Of course my migraines have practically disappeared since I got off the soy, so they could be entirely related to that. But they say caffeine contributes to migraines, so there you go.
-I think caffeine causes bloating, but maybe it's just the soda, so I dunno.
-If I drank caffeine, I'd drink more soda, which has a lot of calories, and that would be detrimental to my diet.

PRO:

-I'm freaking sick of only being able to drink Sprite and lemonade at restaurants.
-There's caffeine in my migraine pills, so technically, I get caffeine on a regular basis anyway so why not enjoy it?
-I read today that studies show that caffeine could help prevent type 2 diabetes. I am at high risk for type 2 diabetes. I think preventing that would be super!
-I want coke when I eat pizza, dammit.
-Um. . .I really like coke. A lot. And most places don't have caffeine free coke, strangely.

There's more reasons, I'm sure, but I can't think of any more. So, tell me your thoughts. My drinking future rests squarely in your hands. No pressure though.

Why do birds suddenly appear, everytime I'm awake?

As the time for my little love bug to come visit, I find myself becoming more and more excited about it. I guess I may be a loving mother after all. Of course, by day three of his visit, he's sure to be driving me crazy again, and then all will be back to normal. But for now I'm busy planning the things we can do. Lawrence and I are going to take him to the Dallas rainforest aquarium. Ethan loves aquariums. I'd also like to take him to Six Flags, but that will depend on finances. I think on April 9th I'll have a family dinner. All those in the family take note. Anyhoo.

I've been reading Anansi Boys, by Neil Gaiman, and I must say, I am totally loving it! I am afraid that Neil might be trying to dethrone Heinlein as my favorite author. Is that wrong? Am I being disloyal? I feel guilt about this. Maybe I should be punished. *wink wink* But seriously, Heinlein's dead! How can I replace a dead man?!? It's just so wrong!

Last night I got to go to a piano recital with Josh. It was very good, partly because I love spending time with my BFF, but MOSTLY because we got to make jokes about flatulence. Plus the lady's name is Wang, so we made wang jokes a-plenty. For instance, there were many Asians in attendance. I said, "Man, Asians sure must love wang!" Good times. It never stopped being funny, either.

Ok, what the HELL is up with the crazy weather? I live in Texas, and it is officially spring, so the weather is supposed to be in the mid 80's, and yet, instead, it's 45 degrees outside right now! That's like dead of winter temperature! What the hell's going on?!? The world is topsy-turvey! I'm freezing my ass off, and I, for one, say that we shouldn't have to stand for this! Write your congressman! There should be laws about things like this!

I like my boyfriend. Tee hee. Friday we're going shopping for a couch. That's the real deal, baby. I still can't get enough of him, and the world seems like a great place. Today I was reveling in the little things; good songs playing on the radio, my hair swishing around, making a coping really well, stuff like that. The bad stuff didn't even bother me. Is this what happiness feels like? I find it foreign and unsettling. And disconcerting. I'm also a little sleepy, cold, and hungry. I'm not sure if all that's related or not. This lifestyle could upset my whole paradigm is all I'm saying. But I'm willing to make the sacrifice and try to adjust to this strange new world. I'm so brave! :)

dinner, in the corners of my mind

I guess I should update today. The only problem is that I really don't have anything to say. I've got a little headache what with all the rain I guess. Not bad, just annoying. I've been missing my baby today. I will call him after I finish this, go potty, and have something to eat. I know you needed that much detail, right? I need to do my damn homework that I've been putting off all week. Suck. Plus, there's no food. Ok. I know I'm an adult, and I shouldn't want my mommy to cook for me, but here's the thing: she usually does cook on Sunday, and she even stayed home from church today for no apparent reason, and there's no food readily available for easy preparation except for frozen dinners, all of which are jam packed full of soy which means a big NO for Margie. So I'm slightly annoyed that I come home and there's no food a-cookin'. I know I shouldn't be, so I won't say anything, but all week long she hasn't been cooking because the floor in the kitchen was pulled up for repairs, and all week long she's been bitching that she can't get in the kitchen to cook, and now she can get in the kitchen, but still no food. Ok, I'm done being a whiney baby on that particular subject. I'm going to Lawrence's for dinner tonight in a few hours, and he's making lasagna. With ricotta. I hate ricotta. I didn't want to say anything when he was talking about the ricotta because he's sick and I don't want to make him feel worse. I offered to try to find something to rustle up for us here and he said no. *sigh* So, looks like I'll be swallowing down ricottaed lasagna with a big fake smile on my face. Won't be the first time I've faked for a man. *wink wink nudge nudge* Hardy har har.

In related news, I feel like such a heifer. I've completely abandoned my diet in full celebration of spring break, and I feel so slubby. I have resolutely refused to weigh myself, but my tire has grown. Damnation. So tomorrow I have to be strong and get back to it with full dedication. *sigh again*

Yep. That's about all. Soooooo. . .ttyl.

splitting hairs

I already had a small humorous comment made up about how ironic it is that nobody commented on my post about how every body's loving some Margie these days, and how once again Irony has made me her bitch, but then Cainnum commented and ruined the whole thing! Good job, Cainnum! Just kidding, love.

Second on my agenda today: Lawrence is sick. Very sick. And as a result, I haven't gotten to see him since Monday, and, even though that's just a few days, and we still talk on the phone twice a day for a total of anywhere from 1-3 hours, I am majorly jonesing for some Lawrence time. Pathetic. But I wanna make out dammit! *sigh* I hope he's better in time for our scheduled date tomorrow night. He's changed it to "tenative" just in case he's not better. Grrr.

And lastly, my hair issues. You see, I died my hair black back in August when I was dating Jared because Jared really likes girls with dark hair and light eyes. But I think it looks pretty good myself. Well, when Jared and I finished at last, I decided I didn't want black hair anymore, so I bought a new color: dark reddish brown. But, due to a variety of factors, I wasn't able to dye my hair right away, and by the time I was able to, I realized that I really do still like it black. But, I had the dye, so I went ahead and went for it. But there's a problem. Only the most recent growth took the dye. Most of my hair is still black. So now I look like a red head badly in need of a root job. Great. So, now I am faced with a decision, and I want your opinion on this. Pay attention boys and girls!

Option 1) dye my roots black again and go to the hairdresser at some undefined point in the future (when I have money and really really want to change my hair color) and have her fix it. If she can.

2) Lawrence offered to pay for the hairdresser NOW if I really want to change my haircolor right now, which I'm not even really sure about. He says it looks great, and says he doesn't mind it whatever color I want to make it. Except blonde. Men.

3) Start dying the roots with semi-permanent black and keep it up for the next 3-4 years until all the permanent black is grown out.

4) Dye it dark brown and hope it blends well enough that I can pull it off till the future point where I want to change it to a lighter color.

Now put in your vote, or feel free to offer additional options that I haven't thought of. Like I said, I kinda like it black, but it does seem a little dark for summer, and I hate to continue doing something to my hair that could be irreversible. But then again, once I get away from black, I might hesitate to ever dye it black again, so maybe I should keep it black till I'm for sure really really sick of it. *shrugs* Help!

Gonna get on down to. . .Margie-TOWN!

Lately I've been noticing more people trying to get on the Margie train. I'm confused and a bit alarmed by this to be honest. After a lifetime of being an unpopular and jaded loner, filling the lonely hours with the attentions of the few people in this world that I can relate to, and are intelligent enough to relate back, I'm not sure what to think of me seeming to be going mainstream. It's weird, and makes me a little uncomfortable. I've noticed lately when I go places, more and more people talk to me in a friendly fashion for no apparent reason. Sunday, Michelle Kazynski was in the library talking to Emily, my Library assistant, about some dinner they're planning, and I made a joke about how I wanted to go to a party, and Michelle said, "We're getting together for dinner next Sunday, you should come, that would be awesome!" She said it in a very excited way, as if she actually WANTED me to come. What's up with that? I said, "Oh, well, I've been going to my boyfriend's house on Sundays," to which she replied that I should bring him too, and I think she might even implied that that would also be "awesome!" So now I've been invited to have dinner with two Mormon couples, bringing along a man that would make me the third Mormon couple. That seems a little "cute little dinner party" to me. I'm still not sure if I'm gonna go or not, and I haven't mentioned it to Lawrence. I recently received an invitation to a Pampered Chef party. Me. Not my mom. Just me, like I'm a real adult person or something. It's weird. And today, the lady that works down the hall from me invited me to lunch. She wears sweaters, slacks, and jewelry. Like, she's a professional and stuff. Of course, I wear baggy capris, a soiled t-shirt (it gets dirty at work, it doesn't start out that way), flip flops, and a messy tangle of hair barely pulled into a pony tail. I dunno. Of course, there's also been more strangers commenting on this very blog, but I think that might have something to do with Hussy's lack of updates lately. I think her readers are having to fill the empty lonely hours with other people's blogs. Sad, really.

Of course, I have noticed that the man who stands at the corner with the signs reading, "Holiness unto the Lord," and, "Please stop for news," has been pulling in a lot of marks lately. Maybe it's just the weather making people more open and friendly and this will all stop in a month or two. Who knows? Not me, that's for sure!

In other news, I've really been enjoying a site called: www.cockeyed.com So far, I've only read bits of the "How much is inside?" section, where they find out how much is in various things, such as a can of shaving cream. It's good stuff, people, you should check it out! Go now! No, WAIT! Comment first, then go! Get a move on, people!

Seasons don't fear the reaper

Ah, spring. The birds are singing, the temperature is pleasant, the sun is shining. Love is in the air, and so is. . .pollen, mold, dust, fungus, and any other countless number of allergens. Some fun. Spring is usually the time of year when I, for one, want to curl into a little ball and stay in my room until swimsuit season. You may all remember that earlier this week, I was sick. I had a runny nose, headache, sore throat, cough and fever. Now my fever's gone and I feel much better. Now I just have the runny nose, headache, sore throat and cough. What an improvement! Yesterday, my dad and I ran a couple of errands. It was me and him, riding in the truck with the windows down, my long hair blowing in the breeze. The sun was shimmering in the sky as Spring opened her sleepy eyes and smiled at us with a twinkle in her eye. The radio was playing oldies that you could really sing along to, and dad was whistling merrily. It reminded me of when I was a little girl and just knew that at any second my dad could randomly decide to stop at 7-11 for a slurpee or somewhere for an ice cream cone. It was sublime. Plus, since we were running errands for my boss, I was getting paid $13.75/hr, which is always nice. But I paid the price later. Oh yes. My nose clogged up, my throat clogged up, my voice became all sexy and scratchy, but I guess there's an upside to every situation. The lovely wind that blows in at 65 miles per hour drives the allergens into my skin, hair, and orifices with the brutal efficiency of a shark attacking a bleeding surfer. *sigh* Even with my lovely lovely steroid shot that makes life bearable, spring is just too much for little ole me. Without the shot, I would be a useless mess right now, and probably would have to be on antibiotics because my allergies would have been so bad that I would have developed a sinus infection and bronchitis. Believe me, it used to happen every spring. I think Mother Nature hates me. I'm not her favorite, that's for DAMN sure.

you asked, I answered!

Once again, my public is clamoring for news of my exciting and inspirational exploits. But, sadly, I am sick, complete with sore throat, hacking cough, and fever, so I have no brain power to think of interesting things to say, so I will respond to the comment from Kiera:

So...what's happening in your life now? Has your boss decided to pro/demote you? Have you learned any new killer moves in Tae Kwon Do? Is Ethan doing anything fun in Utah...has Lawrence taken you anywhere exciting? What about your mom...is she crazy with wedding fever? Making you try on dresses? Pick centerpieces? Your public wants to know! :)

What's happening in my life: uh. . .I'm sick. I'm going out with Julianna tonight. Uh. . .I like tacos.

Has my boss decided to pro/demote me: Nope. There's been no change of status, although he did send me home sick because of my horrible cough. Do you think that's significant?

Have I learned any new killer moves in tae kwon do: Well, Sunday I showed you (meaning Kiera) the latest move I learned, the Audubon (or Autobahn?) kick, which entails spinning around and ending in a roundhouse kick. It makes me feel like a very mean ballerina.

Is Ethan having fun in Utah: Seems to be. No change really.

Has Lawrence taken me anywhere fun: Not this week, although Saturday we're going to Riverdance. Very exciting! I hope my fever's gone by then. Then in April, we're going to see Phantom of the Opera, and I don't know when, but we'll be going to Scarborough. Thanks to Lawrence, I have an exciting jet-set lifestyle now. Look on me with jealousy and envy.

Mom and wedding plans: Nope, mom's calmed down finally. I imagine that when she again gets new information from Sister Christopher about her daughter's wedding plans, it'll start up again. She seems to be leaving the whole dress situation up to me, as she hasn't even MENTIONED a dress. Weird really.

So that's it. I hope this sates your Margie needs for a couple of days. Maybe soon I'll actually have something interesting to say. :) Good day to you.

Carpe Boss's Jugulum

I'm here to say that my boss is an idiot. This morning he tells me I need to get a certain amount of work done on the plaster bench, that amount being, everything due by the thirteenth. That amounts to 15 cases. No problem. I can usually whip off 16 cases in one day when I work on the plaster bench. Oh yeah, and since he didn't want to work Friday, I ALSO need to wax everything due by tomorrow, which is 5 units. Ummm. . .although I have been known to wax 16 units in a day when I am waxing exclusively, I usually wax 8-9. So, today I not only have to make 15 models, I have to wax 5 units. RIIIIIGHT. Does not compute, moron. Simply not possible. Oh, and my the way Margie, in your spare time, bill Cano and write the rent check cause I'm too busy or too lazy to do it my own damn self. Oh, and when you first come in, can you spend 30 minutes looking at my stupid model airplane while I tell you all the things I did to it this weekend? That would be super. Dear Lord this he is annoying. There's no way in HELL I can get all this done today. Well he can just kiss my grits, I'll do what I can, and if he doesn't like it maybe he'll think twice about making me take Fridays off when I really should work.

Another thing he did today really pissed me off. He's told me, that when he's ready to get out of this business in a couple of years, I'll probably take over. Well, I'm not completely committed to that, but you know, I think if he said it, he should stick to his end. Well, today he was telling me that a guy called looking for a job, and he told the guy that it's to bad the guy's not certified, because he would be perfect to take over the lab in a couple of years. Um. . .hello! You realize you're telling this to the person who works for you right now that you ALREADY told could take over and run the lab, right? Fucking jackass. I was feeling bad about the idea of maybe quitting when I get married, but suddenly all that guilt flew right out the window. Jeez what a moron.

And I guess I should formally announce it. I am head over heels in love with Lawrence. I don't know why, I just am. I spent all day yesterday with him and I still could barely drag myself away. Sad really. I've turned into a pathetic love sick version of my self. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to get used to it.

All that and a bag of low fat chips

I am not trying to brag or anything, but I am desperately in need of clothes. After losing so much weight (from 260 to 175 and hopefully more), I can really no longer wear even the clothes that were the tightest that I used to wear. I have given away 5 black garbage bags full of clothes, and bought a few items of clothing in the interim, but even those are getting baggy on me. I didn't want to buy too many clothes, because if I get down to my ideal weight, I will probably drop another size or (maybe) two (but I doubt it). But I really couldn't hold out any longer. I had to have a few key pieces, mainly more capris, but also a nice shirt, and a dress and another skirt wouldn't hurt any either. So, seeing the need was inescapable, I decided to bite the bullet and get some things. But, being wise, I would get them at Walmart! Cheap, and it doesn't matter about quality cause who knows how long I'll need them! I am smart. I look for things. Things that make us go. Uh. . .anyway. So I go, and I've been wearing a size 14-16 at Lane Bryant, which is where I usually shop, but their clothes are getting too big for me, mostly because that aren't cut right for my build anymore. I look for 14-16, but they have their clothes on the 12-14/16-18 sizing. Grr. I was worried that one would be too big, and the other too small, but guess what! I fit into the 12-14's! I can't believe it! I am so excited! I went from a size 22 to a size 12! Does that mean I've dropped 10 sizes, or is it only 5 sizes, since they use the even numbers? Wow. I feel such a sense of accomplishment. Of course, I still need to lose more, but still, not too shabby. I bought; a cute pink skirt, 2 pairs of capris, a nice white button up shirt with 3/4 length sleeves, and a black wrap around dress that is somewhat similar to the one I already have. But the one I already have is getting quite baggy on me since it's a size 20, and this new one was on clearance for $11! Can't get much better than that!

Now before everyone posts comments like, "Oh wow, it must be rough to have problems like having to buy new clothes because all your old ones are too big," please keep in mind that I am a very practical person. It annoys me to no end to have to buy clothes that I might not be able to wear in a few months. I don't have the money nor the patience for that kind of crap. And that's what everyone says, so it wouldn't be original at all. But if I have to buy clothes, it's nice that the clothes are pretty cute this season at least. :)

Regular posting: thing of the past?

So it seems some people get upset with me when I don't post regularly. I find this ironic on several levels. I will list them now.

1) Some of those people rarely comment anyway, so they are basically just blog moochers.

2) Some of those people will go weeks or even months without posting, yet get upset when I go a few days.

3) My life is really fucking boring, so who cares? I mean seriously. I love all yous guys who read, but I wouldn't read my blog, so I don't know why you do.

4) I'm so busy, you'd think I'd have more interesting crap to talk about. But apparently not.

So there you go. I've talked to Josh about the irony, and he disagreed with me completely. Here are his responses (summarized in my words. Josh cannot be legally bound by these statements.)

1) Haven't discussed this one.

2) He says that it's perfectly reasonable for people who don't post to want me to post. He says that I get upset when the authors I like don't put out books regularly, but I don't try to write one myself, so I should understand. But I say that the big difference here is that I am in no way claiming to be an author, whereas the people I know ARE claiming to be bloggers. In your face, Josh!

3) He says that while my life may seem boring to me, it's kind of interesting in a soap opera sort of way. I guess that the correlation can be seen through the fact that I have absolutely no interesting in watching One Tree Hill, yet it stays on the air for some reason. I don't get it.

4) He says that I have plenty to talk about. He points out the fact that I complained about my idiot Interpersonal Communications teacher for like 45 minutes last night. But I say that I can't talk about my teacher every few days. I mean, he's not Jared for pete's sake. :) Josh observed that my life, and even my personality is driven and fueled by angst and misery, and now that I'm happy, I have nothing to talk about. He says it'll take some time to adjust to this new paradigm. This does not change the fact that I'm really freaking busy all the damn time.

I was very pleased, however, to see that BOTH Josh AND Cainnum have updated recently! Hooray! Way to go guys! Now everyone start updating three times a week and my life will be complete. Seriously.

I think the important lesson to be learned here is that my interpersonal communications teacher is an idiot. Really. I think that I could read the chapter, and then teach a better class than him. Maybe I'll go into this next time. Or maybe I'll wait till Monday when I have even more fodder for my ire.