Monday, January 02, 2006
a tale of two hot guys
Tonight I had an interesting experience. Jared and I went to the mall to see a movie, but it didn't start for 45 minutes, so we went walking around the mall. We had explored three branches of said mall and then turned down the forth and final branch, walking close together and arm in arm. A few steps down I spot with my eagle eye the T-Mobile kiosk, and standing there is John (William), as that is where he works 1-10 (he very helpfully informed me while we were making out that time.) His back was to me thank heavens, and I handled things with grace and panache. I gasped audibly, released a short violent, "FUCK," and spun Jared around so we were walking back the other direction. Of course he wanted to know what happened, so I told him that "my other 22 year old was working down there. He asked if he saw us, and I said, "No, his back was to us." He said, "And if he did see us that would be. . .bad?" I replied, "Yes, because you know about him but he doesn't know about you." He wanted to know why, and I told him the truth, that I hadn't seem him since before Jared asked me out. Completely true. Pay no never mind to the fact that I've practically had no conversation with the guy at all. (There's no need for Jared to know that part.) Jared seemed a bit stiff for a while after that, so I said, "Of course if you want to see how hot he is, we could go back." He told me he didn't care about guys' hotness, and I, of course, implied that he's gay and actually does care how hot guys are and he's protesting to cover up how gay he is. I know, I am the QUEEN of relationship conversation! He still seemed stand-offish for a while and I did my best to be extremely ego stroking and flirtatious, and all the while I was half way jumping out of my skin everytime someone walked up behind me because I just KNEW that John would get off work and decide to come see The 40-Year Old Virgin and would sit right behind me and say something, or, even worse, not recognize me and NOT say anything. (Like, especially if he comes so close to me that I HAVE to say hi, and then he's like, uh. . .oh yeah, you're, uh. . .Angie, right?" THAT would be really embarrassing.) But he didn't and Jared warmed up again and all's well that ends well. Man. I'm getting too old for this sneaking around crap. :)
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7 comments:
Oooh!! Drama! This is getting exciting! Next you should show up where Jared works with John and see what hilarity ensues. ;)
Ooh, maybe they'll fight for you. If this senario ever occurs in my presence, you can expect my subtle social manipulations toward that end. Nothing says love like two hot guys oozing testosterone.
Kiera: LOL. I think I saw that episode of Sabrine the Teenage Witch. I think it'll all turn out with both of them dumping me and I'll learn an important lesson about how if you date more than one person at once, you have to be more careful.
Josh: And how exactly are you going to be manipulating? And, hee hee, I had already fantasized about that eventuality (before last night's events). No matter what happens, I win. :D
Come on, with two guys who both like the same girl, it can't even really be considered manipulation, just...steering.
But I mean, what are you ends, here? Are you going to pick the one you like best and try to get him to like me more? I just want to know what to expect in this imaginary scenario. :)
I was planning a neutral approach; I wouldn't want to influence the outcome of the competition. The plan mostly consists of making encouraging noises when either of them makes any volatile remarks. If they both are frustrating civil to each other, I might have to fabricate a few "He said he was gonna kick your ass", and if that doesn't work, "Hold it guys, I don't think you should fight...I mean *insert name of calmer looking combatant-to-be* would totally wipe the floor with *insert name of more enraged combatant-to-be*". If push comes to shove, then there might be come chicken noises "from the crowd". If THAT doesn't work (very unlikely, that's lion and the lamb odds), then I back off, defeated, and you get to keep both in some sort of dirty group thing.
Dirty group thing, eh? I like the sound of that. :) Yes, that's right. I read the entire message and enjoyed it thoroughly, but the mention of forbidden sex acts wiped all thoughts of anything else from my mind. You should know better than to mention the sex part LAST, dodo.
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